Recently a new pastor friend brought to my attention a passage found in Acts 12. This pastor was explaining that the passage is about the night before Peter was to be executed. I'm just going to use his exact words..."Peter was asleep and Luke uses an old Greek word to describe the cell he was in. The New Testament only uses that word in this passage. It literally means "a dwelling," a "house/home." Even on that night when he was about to be executed, he slept like he was at home. The point: The only place a believer should ever be truly at home is in the will of God. Peter made a choice to follow Christ and live in His will regardless of what happened in his future. All of us have to answer that same call. "
I had never known about the use of that word in that particular story and it brought great peace to my heart the night that he shared what he had been studying. I've often struggled in how to explain to someone how we feel about living here. People ask us how we are and what do we miss - we know they mean well but it's hard to describe the fact that we don't dwell on what we miss every moment of every day. Sure we love our families and are beyond grateful for them but this is our home. From the moment we set foot in Mada, the Lord has confirmed over and over again that this is our home. This is where He wants us to live, to raise our daughter, & to tell His story. Of course any time Chik-Fil-A wants to open a restaurant here we'd be okay with that too! :)
Obviously, if you have read our blog, you know there are hard days - but even through the tears or the frustrations over cultural differences there is a truly unexplainable peace. More than peace, there is joy, there is relief in knowing that no matter what, we are exactly where He has planned for us to be. Overwhelming situations happen - as in the trip out to the bush back in November - but the fact is, He planned our steps long ago. Every single thing that happens works out for His glory and hopefully works as a fire to shape us into the vessels He desires for us to be.
We have both felt called to foreign missions long before we met one another and fell in love. Everyone always told us that that fact would be such assurance during the hard days on the field...that we had felt the call for SO long. However, what I've come to discover in the past 6 months is that the assurance comes in knowing Who my Savior is. I am a sinner, a worrier, a wife, a mother, a language learner, a daughter, but more than any of that - 1st and foremost, I am a child of the King. My relationship with Him is what keeps me grounded. The promises He has written on my heart since I was a little girl keeps me focused. I fail so miserably...but the thing is I would no matter what continent I lived on or what language I spoke.
I am inadequate.
I do not know the answers.
I am proof that missionaries are just ordinary people.
There is nothing special in and of myself.
It is all Him.
It's His story
- this is the role He has written for me to play.
I couldn't do it without His script, His wisdom, His coaching, His redirection, His discipline, His refinement. We wouldn't be here without Him.
So what is "home"? What enables us to sleep as Peter did wherever we may be laying our heads?
It's simple - He does.
Without Him - there is no home for us. With Him - home is wherever He asks us to be.